I had a sudden attack of grumpiness et crabbiness hours ago. It’s funny but I guess I kind of copy each tantrum of my nursery kids back in Bangkok., like Rj’s No No or Mawin and Jamie’s getting their way all the time and the likes.
Late this afternoon, I got prepped up to watch a variety show that will showcase different dances and events of the past decades. My cousin was one of the performers but because my sister won’t come with me, I was stuck at home feeling down and low in spirits. She said we only have one umbrella and if we will be in it together we might end up getting colds. She hasn’t been feeling well so she thought it would be best to stay at home and rest.
Well, I can’t take a No especially if I am dead set to go but I also don’t want to go all by myself. So, I threw tantrums as a way of expressing my anger and frustrations towards my sister. She thought I went ballistic and was way too immature to handle such situation and said point blank that I was acting like a 3 or 5 year kid (or much worse than that-prolly a lunatic) and that nobody will take me seriously if I continue being childish.
For a while, I calmed down after throwing some of the pillows and stuff and suddenly realized that my immaturity and childishness got the better of me. Sometimes, I hate myself for being that. It’s eating me alive. I reckon I have to take Anger Management 101 although I know that deep down in my heart I can be calm, cool and collected but there are just few instances that I can’t control my self.
While doing some grocery with Ma and Pa, I ended up in a sour mood when Papa exercised his frugality to its maximum level. Meaning, I have to get only the basic commodities and that this pack is a duplication of this pack and that it has to go back to the shelf where it belongs. Hahaha!
But after some one on one reflection of all my alter egos, I came to realize that I am plainly immature and that I have to change it.
I am sorry… il be good next time.
I am just having one of those Friday the 13th night blues... :(
