Thoughts!

My little boy is taking his afternoon nap so I decided to write here. Oh, I will miss our afternoons like this. Few weeks from now, I will be back to work. Sometimes, I wish I could just stay at home and watch him grow day by day. Right now, he is showing lots of tricks and crazy antics that left us all laughing. He likes to talk too! ( talk meaning --- dada,mamam, ata, papa, laaaa,baaaah, tataaa)  He is my little chatter box and I know I will be hearing lots of stories from him when he grows up and when he is already in school. He can't take few steps yet (like on his own) but he can managed to cruise around the room by holding whatever is on his way for support. He tried to let go several times but he wobbled so I hold him before he loses his balance.

Oh boy, 2 more months to go and my little Nate will turn 1! I can hardly believe it but yes... babies do grow up real fast. I perfectly remember the day I gave birth to him. i remember pushing so hard and I lovingly remembered the first time I saw him and the first time I heard him cry. For the past 10 months, I was there witnessing every milestone of his development and so I kinda feel sad that I have to leave him in the hands of a sitter. My hubby and I agreed to get him a nanny/ sitter but I am still partial with that decision. I still prefer to have someone in the family to look after him. 

Right now, I am still trying to organize my uber cluttered brain. I have to finish a paper in my post grad studies. I need to finish it not because others expect me to get the degree but more so because I want to prove to myself that I can do it. That even if I have a baby and a husband to mind and a job that demands most of my time, I can still juggle those roles and can still keep up with its demands.

Why should I get back to circulation?  Why do I have to work when I can be a stay at home mom if I want to?  I have been contemplating on this and I have been weighing the pros and cons. At one point, I just decided on my own. Although, I did ask my husband and my family on their "say" but the final decision really came on me.

I decided to get back to work primarily because I want to grow in my chosen field of career. I want to hone and sharpen my skills in teaching. Now that I am already 31, I feel like I need to do the things that I love and excel in it. Aside from professional growth, I also want to foot my own bills and not to
rely on my husband everytime I want to buy something for myself or for my baby. I also want to help my husband tuck a portion of our collected salaries for family savings. It is deem necessary to save for the rainy days and I want to get an insurance policy for my little boy out from my own pocket. Or a savings of some sort. I believe those are the primary reasons why I decided to go back to work.

And yes, I also want to boost my confidence and self -esteem.
 And yes, I like wearing a little make-up ....
And yes, I like dressing up. I cannot imagine myself wearing muu-muu at home and doing household
chores for the rest of my life.
And yes, I want to be a career woman who can balance everything. Work.Life.Balance.

And I hope I made the right decision. So help me God!